The first time that I heard anti-Desi sentiment in my community, I was a PhD student.
A white person said to me, “the Indians are a gang, I mean dots, not feathers.”
I didn’t speak up. My mentors are Desi – and they are kind. I am still ashamed.
The next time, I was an up-and-coming scholar.
A white person said to me, “they’re accepting each other's papers,” I asked “who” – he said look at this journal. When I did, I saw the names of my mentors and their friends. My name was among them. It was too late to speak up.
The third time, I was the President-Elect of an Academic Association.
A white person said to me, “my student tells me this person, who is from … ” I asked for evidence of misconduct and received none.
Only later, I recognized that I mistook jealousy for racism.
The fourth time, I was at a meeting of senior scholars.
A largely white author group presented a not very rigorous study that found pro-Desi bias on editorial boards.
This time, emboldened by the comments of others, I spoke up.
The fifth time, I was on a zoom call.
A white person asked if had seen "the paper" about “Indians and editorial boards".
The paper states “there were more editorial board members of Indian ancestry than one would expect, while several other ethnicities appeared on editorial boards in smaller numbers than one would expect, in comparison to” this professional association’s members.
When I read the abstract, I wondered why? a paper that could
have celebrated Desi success? seemed to question that these scholars served on editorial boards?
When I read about the data, I wondered why they labeled all Desi-faculty as Indians?
When I read the method, I wondered how could an IRB approve such a study?
When I read the implications, I wondered how one could expect journals owned by other associations, to reflect their associations' demography?
Google the paper for yourself and see if it evokes the same questions.
Only on the fifth time, did I speak up on my own.
I demanded the editor and the sponsoring association retract the paper – there were problems in the paper's logic, method, and presentation.
I resigned as a “senior scholar” of the association. I am ashamed that I was ever affiliated.
I threatened to go public with my concerns, preferring a quiet resolution.
Yet, the paper remains published and is being cited as truth.
So here I am, prodded by my guilt, expressing my concern in a public forum.
Since my demand, I had a paper summarily rejected, a “senior” editor stepped off a special issue, and soon, I anticipate more sanctions will come.
It doesn’t matter. I deserve the punishment. I should have spoken up the first time. I am ashamed it took so long to speak up.
I hope more senior scholars will raise their voices. There is no room for racism – against anyone – in academe. It will take many voices to bring about real change.
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