Some. years ago, a faculty friend took his own life. He had struggled for a long time. It devastated me.
Every November, I look back with regret and wish that I had been a better friend. I know there is not much that I could have done. But, I will always wonder what I could have done better.
Today, I learned that another friend took his own life. I don't know the details. I just know another person, who was part of my extended family, is gone.
Often, people contact me with questions with second guesses on posts - who am I talking about? And so on.
Please don't.
Just do this.
If you know someone who is struggling, take some time to listen.
If you know someone at risk of self-harm, take some time to assess their well-being.
If you know someone threatening self-harm, call a professional.
The academic world is hard. The broader world is harder.
We don't need to make it harder for people struggling by talking about them or being unkind.
We need to offer them support and kindness.
We also need to support the people around them.
Families of those that struggle often fear being stigmatized or worse.
If you know a family coping with these issues, support them.
If they have young children, the parents can likely use a night off. Offer to sit for them.
If they have adult children in trouble, buy them a cup of coffee and listen.
If their lawn isn't mowed or snow shoveled, help them out.
Neighborliness, without stigmatization, goes a long way.
We can build a better academy, and a better world, if we act on our best instincts and show kindness to people that struggle.
Lets build that better world together.
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