I woke up this morning to a comment on a post.
My post encouraged people to find balance & included pictures of me and my daughter going on holiday. It was part of my recurring series of posts encouraging people to find balance in their lives & not always work.
The comment suggested that the post belonged on Facebook.
Without thinking, I deleted the post.
Why? Because I could see the point - it could be construed as a FB-like post and I don’t want to offend anyone.
I've received other comments to that effect about my series of personal posts about balance & taking time with your family and/or loved ones.
For whatever reason, several, always white, men, have felt compelled to publicly comment or privately message, that my posts that underscore the import of balancing family and personal lives with work, don't belong on LinkedIn.
For whatever reason, these men seem to think work can be separated from life - and that LinkedIn should be used to promulgate that point of view. Their comments are always a bit aggressive, judgy, and imply that "they know" how an open platform for sharing ideas should be used.
I caught myself running through reasons - perhaps - it's bc they have the privilege - they have partners, money, and power necessary to separate the different domains of their experience? I had more, darker, thoughts.
I know my tone is harsh - but it would be inauthentic to say I thought about flowers and unicorns.
I caught myself getting angry & jealous that it was not so simple for me.
I can't separate the work and life domains.
As a single parent, my work and personal life are intimately commingled - managing my teen often interjects into my workday - my workday often interjects into my family time - my teen often travels with me when I'm working - my teen often makes comments that inform my work (esp. as it pertains to studying social media).
My work-life is better for sharing it with my teen - I make no apologies - and I make no apologies for advocating for balance.
I regret pulling down the post - because by doing so - I let a person define what I share about my work experience. I should not have let that privileged view silence my own, legitimate view.
While LinkedIn is about work and professional issues, it is also an appropriate space for advocating for a healthier way of managing their interplay with all the parts of our lives.
While Linkedin is about work and professional lives, it's also about acknowledging that we all configure our lives in different ways & that experiences like mine are ok.
So an apology to those that I let down by deleting the post. I should not have. I will do better.
I will advocate for balance in an authentic way - and not pretend - that work exists separately from life - esp. for the many people like me - who commingle work and life out of necessity.
And to the commenters - if you push at me - expect a pushback.
Comments